Ultramarine

by Petriform

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1.
loving you in every single way i've lost the world mind and soul succumbing to decay life force unfurled i am so afraid please help i can't just wait tell me that it's not too late
2.
03:43
somebody said it and i heard it collect yourself now of all the things that could go wrong it'll never take me long we'll piece together little songs to pretend that we belong and we run in the dark like the cinema live through imperfect alibis when we're not trying to get by i see the silver in your eyes everything else long since died still we run in the dark and it can't be undone and when our run is done they move on
3.
imagine if our memories could just enfold us it's been so very many years i can't extol us we knew each other before we'd met or so they told us but no one spoke of that again as time consoled us quick to pick up your sword and shield your dreaming lifeline perish the thought that we're just young with too much free time but when we hopped into that car bound for the incline the first time that my eyes caught snow they were stuck in recline and i wonder why leave your home there's nothing that's there for you now time's gone by and you only left your vow a slot machine in a grocery store distracts from infights you didn't really want to be here for many more nights she asked me if i knew the lord his love and his light i think you wanted to love, too would it feel right and i wonder why you should has heaven sent you now
4.
03:52
she found herself beside the fountain at a moment's notice she'd called herself there for a whim she'd might fulfill another time would find her in the daily grind, she knows this no longer waking from under the windowsill and all the passersby just look so happy in their movement she has to wonder what's so great with the routine to feel like how any of them look would be an improvement instead of paralyzed inside a moving scene and right there by the fountain she is all but left to ponder and pondering's a very lonely place to be, 'cause she's more or less the same that she's always been trying so very hard to reign it in what can you even do when you just can't win you might not try so hard anymore they woke up from the slight noise bleeding into their hotel room they'd got no place to go until the night was young they hoped they'd get the phone call from their favorite personnel soon tried not to think about it when it didn't come and right there in the hotel bed they're all but left to ponder and pondering's a very lonely place to be, 'cause they're more or less the same that they've always been desperately clawing right out from within we're more or less the same that we've always been
5.
a gentle walk is all it takes through mid-december to spur these thoughts, like "what a waste" you're my dream lender but what you give, you take away to render hollow my role is the worse regret it all, so send for your best healing waves take them with you wherever you go i hope you rest well for all your days i understand if you don't want to come home i traveled far to see the day you promised long ago and now i feel like yesterday is too far back to row and what you gave, you took away and rendered hollow you never thought so much to leave an act to follow send for your best you deserve the best but that's more than I can give so move along
6.
you're running away from what you've sown no repentance and then you say damn the other people where can you go no consequence rest of your days run my hand on the top of your chainlink fence not courageous to break the skin i don't respect your decisions
7.
03:26
i should have known i'd not been saved just when i thought things were through i cannot take this to my grave i shudder when i think of you 'cause i know you kill first chance that you get you'll get yours in time i just want what's mine the visions of your nature set collector of blue flowers you take all of what you can get before all things turn sour your brutal leverage cuts again the knife will fall where you choose the petrifying mise-en-scène a laceration, not a bruise yes i know you kill i will take what's mine
8.
04:07
i fall in the middle of it yes in the midst of it out of my depth with you brick wall strapped in tight and headed to end up embedded what is there left to lose that's the point that i'm trying to make but with each mistake wonder what it meant to you bend the joint 'til it breaks in two and the pain seeps through to remind you what you shouldn't do that's the point thick blinds being drawn in the dark to hide a grim remark if only that were true i know how to follow the drill and in the end, i'm still out of my depth with you but i can't relate being as far gone as you've resolved to what am i to do it won't matter in a little few
9.
02:37
oh, what a fool under your rule not quite by chance some saw it fit to wield the lance and depose you, now there's thyme on the grave it's left unscathed spirit's unrest one tyrant specter's cruel behest how long will you be content to weave such falsehoods into prayer with a wyvern's stare taken great pain to still refrain now this charade dies with your soul where it pervades yes i've made my mind to repent and dethrone you where you stand you've no method to grasp daggers in your hands so go hide from whence you came left to memory
10.
03:15
is it all over were we wrong will we be closer with this song if this really is it, i don't know what to say good night goodbye i always feared it might take this long to debilitate the vessel we thought strong i am so afraid please
11.
05:56
shut the car door behind me another time radio and i are going for another ride what they gave me didn't help believe me, i really tried isn't it funny just how easy it is to land on either side lucky ones, they get to row ashore; when the hell do i? sweep away the pieces send them off to sea 'cause i can't quite measure up life is precious it shouldn't be wasted on me i saw the sun rise from the deck of a moving train saw it from the cliffside too, but it's not the same the best part of freefall's the word free yeah i can't quite measure up 'cause i know that it shouldn't be wasted on me don't waste it taking exits through the fog and brilliant lights ever filtered down to nothing far out of sight there's no easy way to bear it whatever the case may be but i know better than to think that it shouldn't be wasted on me

about

Ultramarine. The most brilliant blue, born of lazurite, once by necessity reserved for only the most sacred details of painted images at the behest of artists who could dream of affording it in the first place, its vastly more accessible synthetic form shines brighter than its oft-chased natural counterpart ever did.

With one exception, these songs were written between 2014 and 2016, starting directly after the 28 December 2013 release of "Brown Plaid" and concurrently with the early stages of "Don't Worry, You're Great!" I both expected and intended to release this album well before "Don't Worry, You're Great!" was completed, but I could not find it in me to finish hardly any of the songs, and the project lost steam.

This was not without reason. I have not been shy about my experience with depression and anxiety over the last couple of years, and though things are quite a bit better now than they were then, the album as it exists as a product of that time approaches the more difficult facets of those issues in ways that DWYG certainly did not. The juxtaposition is harsh; in fact, I considered shelving this album entirely to avoid disappointing or alienating folks who found something to like in DWYG. I thought that releasing this work would, somehow, delegitimize or take away from that album's overarching message of optimism and positivity, as if it would be a bait and switch of sorts to admit that, despite everything, things were not always so great. Eventually, though, I decided that I would be remiss to discard or dismiss more product of the very real feelings and dispositions that painted that period in my life, and additionally the conscious effort I'd made to push myself outside of my comfort zone with regard to things like going off-vocoder more often, at odds with the established work as it may be. Now, at long last, it is finished.

I am in a better place in my life than I was at the time most of these songs were written, and thus revisiting and finishing them was not always pleasant. I'd be lying if I said I weren't looking forward to having the album behind me and moving on to the next thing (there are lots of them to come!). But presently, I know it has value, and I hope you find something within that is similarly of value to you.

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released December 12, 2017

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Petriform

Across California and beyond, Petriform has brought energetic NES chipmusic to the table for years. Get ready for a chipstyle experience drawn unapologetically from the realms of bubblegum pop, VGM, prog metal, third-wave ska, happy hardcore, turn-of-the-millenium pop punk, and more. ... more

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